One Year Ago Today

One year ago today, I found out that I was pregnant with Mary Katherine.  I remember how excited I felt getting those first light lines on several pregnancy tests.  I could have never imagined how much I would love the little girl baby tht those lines represented.  One year ago today she was just a few little cells growing in me.  Thank you God for the most precious gift of all.

What is Wrong With My Baby?

I am at a loss.  Not sure what to do about Mary Katherine.  She is almost four months old...and ever since she was hospitalized for RSV, she is not the same. She breaths fine...and her congestion and cough are gone...but something is just not right.  She doesn't nurse with any sort of gusto, she cries when she nurses or takes a bottle, she chews on her hand, she will only sleep for about 20 minutes at a time (except at night), and becomes hysterical crying for long periods of time.  We took her to the pediatrician who started her on Zantac two weeks ago for acid reflux...but the behavior continues.  I keep checking for teeth...thinking that she could be teething...but there is nothing.  And she is hysterical when she cries...I can't imagine that teething would cause her to cry the way that she does.

It is so upsetting!  It just makes me sick to hear her crying like this.  She is in pain, I can tell....but when I take her to the pediatrician's office, everything is fine.  I don't know what to do.  She was such a sweet and gentle and quiet baby until three weeks ago.  I am worried that something is really wrong with her.  My sweet little girl....I wish I could help you!

Three Months Old

My dearest sweet girl.  Today you are three months old!  You are no longer a "newborn"...you are a "baby" now.  Where has the time gone.  Already you are smiling when you see Mommy.  You are such a sweet girl.  You rarely cry except when you are tired and there is too much noise and stimulation.  Often you will cry terribly right before you fall to sleep.  I used to go crazy trying to figure out what was wrong...why you were crying so hard...but now I know that you are just tired and need to cry a bit before you can drift off.

I try to go home every day at lunch so that you can nurse.  Now that we live just a few miles from work I have that luxury when I am not required to work through lunch.  It is so nice to be home with you and Daddy and Jack.  When I come home and you see me, you give me the sweetest smile.  I can't explain it...but you seem so much older and wiser than three months.  When you smile, it is like you are saying I love you in such a way that I feel that you really do.  It is so hard to explain but your expression is so deep, you seem to have so much inside your soul....I love you my girl...and I can't wait to see what your life holds for you.

You still have very little hair...and it still looks like it is going to be lighter than Jacks.  I hope that you will be blonde.  Your eyes are dark...it looks like they will be a lovely deep brown...and you have such beautiful lips and nose and eyes.  People stop me at the store to tell me what perfect features you have and how beautiful you are as your face is so perfect.

You now weigh 13lbs 6oz.  You are pushing yourself up on your arms when on your tummy really well now.  You can roll from tummy to back and are making a good effort to go from back to tummy (something your brother never really did).  You laughed for the first time for me today....it was a hearty laugh when I kissed your tummy and then said peek a boo.  You have a sweet deep beautiful little laugh.  It makes me want to cry when I think of your sweet face laughing.  You have your whole life ahead of you sweet girl.  I am so thankful that God allowed us to have such a sweet soul in our lives.  I love you Katie Boo.