Not Doing Well

I am so angry...I don't really know why. At the same time I am totally depressed. My temperature took a nose dive this morning....so I think that AF is on her way. But that is not the reason I feel the way I do...at least I don't think it is. I can't adequately describe the way I feel. Apathy and anger mixed together may be the best I can do. I am totally screwing up my job to the point that I am afraid I may lose it. I don't know if I can turn it around at this point and if I lose my job, Paul and I lose everything....Everything. I am tired, but don't want to sleep, I'm not hungry but I just keep eating. I can think of nothing to get excited about...and that is unusual for me. I usually have such passion, at least for the obsession of the moment, and right now I can't think of anything that would make me feel anything. Even if I were pregnant, I can't imagine really even caring. I have also totally screwed up my marriage. Paul has given up everything for me...he works so hard to help with our animal rescue...we have absolutely no time for "us." I just don't care about anything anymore and I see all of the important things in my life slipping away from me...I am very afraid.